Want to know how to be super confident in life? There is one extremely powerful exercise I learned from a good friend. Let me share it with you.
Anyone who has ever taken one of the many online confidence training courses will tell you that confidence is king.
It’s true. When you have confidence, life is easy. When you have zero confidence, life is impossible.
If you have low self confidence, don’t sweat. There is a solution
There are some really great techniques that you can use to build up your self confidence. So if you’ve been wondering how to be super confident, it’s just a mater of training yourself, just the same way you train your muscles.
Let me share with you a great way of increasing yourself esteem. It’s a tip I picked up from a friend who works in counseling self esteem programs in schools. It’s extremely effective!
It’s a technique all about focusing on the small changes you’re making in the world.
This is an incredibly simple exercise. And, honestly, I think it is the answer to where does confidence come from and a way how to be super confident, because when you realise that youdo, continually, make real changes in the world each and every moment of your life, you recognise that you have power.
The key to confidence is having power. And the key to having power is recognising the differences that you make in the world (kinda like that movie, It’s A Wonderful Life).
So, the key to confidence is recognising your power. Sadly, a lot us actively prevent ourselves from realising just precisely how much power we have.
How I am maintaining my own confidence right now despite setback
At the moment I am obsessed with selling my books “Smoking Thoughts” and “War within Grief” (see note below). \Like many authors and artists have, I’m a little obsessed with the idea of becoming a successful writer (and actor; neither of which I would currently consider myself to be). I’ve been so obsessed about this that it has eclipsed seemingly everything else I do. I have been oblivious to minor successes that I have had over recent times because they weren’t the success I wanted most. Naturally, this has been affecting my self confidence.
When you fail to realise the differences you are making in the here and now, when you fail to recognise your minor successes on a day to day basis, you begin to feel like you can’t accomplish anything, as though you are completely powerless. That becomes a negative self belief that will hold you back until you kill it.
If you want to be super confident you have to realist that you do have power. You have to see all the ways you’re changing the world each and every day.
It’s the seeing part that is most important here.
We are all capable of making changes in the world. Heck, we all make changes in the world even when we don’t want to. Even by staying in bed and doing nothing you still make changes in our world (you make life worse for everyone else who has to pick up your slack).
The point is; whenever we do anything, we are making changes. We are never truly powerless, but we often forget to recognise the changes we are making in the real world, so we create a false belief in our incompetence.
To recap: Where does confidence come from? It comes from recognising the changes we make in the world.
How to be super confident: Recognise those changes every moment of our lives
Most often, when we feel powerless it is because we are blinding ourselves by one goal that we hold onto too tightly.
Goals, like my personal goal of becoming a successful author and actor, are nowhere near as important as our ability to enjoy the moments of our lives or as important as our mental health or self confidence.
If you want to have self confidence youmust be willing to put aside our lofty aspirations and focus on the positive affects you are having on the world. By focussing on the changes you’re making—no matter how small they may be—you set your mind on the path of empowerment. You begin to feel capable of more and more.
Even if you are currently at an extremely low level of self esteem or if you are suffering from depression, you can still choose to focus on the small changes you are making.
Perhaps all we are capable of is some seemingly miniscule task like giving a weak smile. So long as we focus on the action and the outcome; so long as we focus on lifting our cheeks and then recognising the difference that action makes in others (causing them to smile back) then we will be setting our minds down the right path. This will begin to develop your self confidence and from there you will quite naturally move on to bigger actions and bigger outcomes.
Remember, it’s the little baby steps that lead us up the mountain.
What this all comes down to is this.
To have self confidence right now, simply perform some action, no matter how small, and be mindfully aware of the changes that action makes in the real world.
Notice that you did something and something happened in response. Remind yourself that you do have power in the real world, that you can create change.
This exercise is ridiculously easy, yet it is a very good way to build self confidence.
Having self confidence is easy; remembering to have self confidence is the hard part.
MORE ON SELF CONFIDENCE
So, we know how to have self confidence. We know how to be super confident. We know where confidence comes from.